The event will be held Friday, April 30th at the Brazos County Expo Center with dinner beginning at 6:00 p.m. followed by the dance competition. Tickets are $50 per person or $1,000 for a table of 10. RSVP by April 23 at www.hlth4all.org or by calling 979-575-4496.

Celebrity dance teams include: Jerrod Johnson & “Surprise Dancer”; Donnis Baggett & Beverly Brown; David & Julia Gardner; Gene & Kathy Joyce; Celia Goode-Haddock & Bill Haddock; Ron & Katie Fox; Saysha Kovacevich & Marty Cangelose; Scott DeLucia & Jacque Flagg; Clay & Stacy Riebe; Mary & David Stasny; Jordan Meserole & Alli (from Candy 95’s “ Morning Candy”); Danny Ballard & Nkrumah Dixon; David & Catherine Childers; Jeff & Amanda Mann; Todd & Sally Matthews; Shane McAuliffe & Meredith Stancik; Cal & Beth McNeil; Shawn & Nicole Ponzio; Clayton & Jana Rhoades; Barry & Angie Solcher; Stephen & Allyson Wright; Eddie Coulson & Lauren Osborne.

The judges will be: Mike Cargill; Janna Joerns; K. O. & Dee (from “The Mix Morning Show”). Rick Hill will be the Master of Cerimonies.

Health For All is a nonprofit clinic in Bryan that serves thousands of low income, medically uninsured patients every year. Our clinic provides free doctor visits, pharmaceuticals, lab tests, X-rays, education and counseling to low income residents of the Brazos Valley who do not have health insurance and do not qualify for government programs such as Medicaid, Medicare or county indigent funds. By providing an alternative to expensive emergency room visits by the uninsured, Health for All saves area hospitals and taxpayers over $116,000 per week (more than $6,000,000 per year).

For more information about Health For All, call Derek Dictson at 979-575-4496 or e-mail at ED@hlth4all.org.

Source: http://www.hlth4all.org/AboutUs/NewsandUpdates/articleType/ArticleView/articleId/38/Health-For-All-Introduces-DANCING-FOR-THE-HEALTH-OF-IT

Acute Lead Poisoning – Gunshot wound
Baby catcher – obstetrician
Babygram -x-raying (radiographing) a newborn
Chocolate Hostage – constipated
Imaginascope – what you use during radiology rounds to see the lesion the clinician is showing you but you don’t see

And a ton more on the site.  Each industry has a certain jargon and the medical community tries to beat them all.

I was interviewing an elderly man who was being admitted to my unit. I finally got to the cardiovascular conditions and asked him if he had angina. He replied “Why no! That is a female part.” – Submitted by April Cummings
When I was a student a nursing colleague of mine was asked by a patient if his testes had gone black. Silently she pulled the screens around the bed, asked him to drop his pyjama bottoms and had a look. ‘No everythings fine,’ she reassured him, ‘What made you think something was wrong?’ ‘I didn’t think anything was wrong,’ he replied, ‘I only asked if my test results had come back.’ Submitted by: Julia Macdonald

One day, we had a very confused patient sitting at the nursing station. We kept her near the nursing station so we could monitor her safety. The woman kept insisting to all who could hear that she was pregnant and in labor. Our medical director came walking down the hall just in time to hear all the commotion. He began to assess her and interview her regarding her “labor pains”. He asked the patient exactly how she could have become pregnant at her age. She gave him a very bewildered look and said matter-of-factly ‘Why if you don’t know by now doctor, I don’t feel like it’s my place to tell you!’

Someone at work posted a copy of some of the stories from your site so I had to look it up myself. I especially enjoyed this section.” One question on our admission form is designed to assess a patient’s orientation: “where are you now?” Many times the answer is “I’m right here!” Enjoyed the site and I’ll be back.

A nurse at the beginning of the shift places her stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient’s anterior chest wall. “Big breaths,” instructed the nurse. “Yes, they used to be,” remorsed the patient.

One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a “massive internal fart.”

I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, Cover your right eye with your hand.” He read the 20/20 line perfectly. “Now your left.” Again, a flawless read. “Now both,” I requested. There was silence He couldn’t even read the large E on the top line. I turned and discovered that he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his eyes covered.

A nurses’ aide was helping a patient into the bathroom when the patient exclaimed,”You’re not coming in here with me. This is a one-seater.”

During a patient’s two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed his doctor that he was having trouble with one of his medications. “Which one?”, asked the doctor. “The patch.” The nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I’m running out of places to put it!” The doctor had him quickly undress and discovered what he hoped he wouldn’t see….Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.

While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, “How long have you been bedridden?” After a look of complete confusion she answered, “Why, not for about twenty years-when my husband was alive.”

And of course, the best is saved for last…. A nurse caring for a woman from Kentucky asked, “So how’s your breakfast this morning?” “It’s very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can’t seem to get used to the taste,” the patient replied. The nurse asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled “KY Jelly.”